Feels like I'm all alone in this. Whoop. Haha morning lesson tomorrow yet I'm still online. Still not getting much drive but i gu...

But i just want to be perfect.

10:32 PM Cassandra Tan 0 Comments

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Feels like I'm all alone in this.

Whoop. Haha morning lesson tomorrow yet I'm still online. Still not getting much drive but i guess there was a start today. Nah just ranting here, nothing much.

Sigh, as much as I feel alone and stressed up and such, I won't deny that there's a bunch of great friends around me who will always be there for me. :) The class this year is much more bonded and I definitely feel much happier. Well, not totally THAT bonded but at least we're definitely a whole lot better as compared to last year where we were always broken up into cliques. Besides, I have selective looking now I don't go for social suicide like people so everything's fine! I feel close to CCC people too becos we do understand one another and no matter what happens, we'll always stand up for one another. As chessy as it sounds, yeah.

Sometimes I do wish that time could be rewound. That way, I'll be able to undo all the silly mistakes I ever made and I could have had this life a long time ago. Its weird huh, thinking if we could live life at its present and get back to the past to fix everything based on what we know now, so that these mistakes would have never happened. But as the saying goes, if we don't fail, we'll never learn. Failing sure is good, but too much of it makes it really demoralizing for one. Well I admit, I compare. I compare looks, grades, body and such because well, I'm not perfect, and I desperately want to be.
Many times, we do wish that we could be someone else. Maybe our best friends, or ones that we silently admire, but one thing I've learnt for sure is that as much as we want to, we can't be them. As hard as we try, we'll still have an element of ourselves that'll continue screwing everything up. So, why bother?

Yeah I know, easier said than done.

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